Transformation

"Nobody knows how the kindling flame of life and power leaps from one life to another. What is the magic quality in a person which instantly awakens faith? You listen to a hundred persons unmoved and unchanged: you hear a few quiet words from the man with the kindling torch and you suddenly discover what life means for you forevermore."--Rufus Jones, Quaker historian, theologian and philosopher (Rufus Jones: Essential writings by Rufus Jones, Kerry Walters).

Jones puts words to a subject that I've pondered about, what makes people change?  My friend HyunSoak pointed out in seminary that he knew a church member that prayed and prayed, but she never seemed to change.  How does faith awaken that radically changes someone from the inside out?

My own experience of inner and outer transformation came not out of choice, but out of necessity.  I was in a deep place of pain, and either I could give up my life all together or choose to change.  It did not hurt that I fell apart at a faith community called L'Arche in DC, where I found a safe place in which to fall apart.

I choose to incorporate some time of silence and solitude to ignite the "kindling flame."  On most days, I barely feel a spark let alone a flame.  It has been more difficult to make time for silence and solitude as I welcome our almost 2 months old daughter.  How do I awaken faith in the midst of my very ordinary life?  I hope to uncover and discover this as I keep experiencing life and writing about it.

Getting Current

I started this blog when I lived in L'Arche GWDC, while I was a practicing Catholic.  I am still drawn to contemplatives and mystics of the Catholic Church, but I am also drawn to mystics of other Christian traditions and other faith traditions as well.

I am currently a practicing Quaker (Religious Society of Friends).  I now live in Richmond, VA.  A lots changed and I hope to update this blog more regularly both for myself, and for whoever my experiences can be helpful to.  Thank you for reading.

"Tree of Silence"

This is a water color painting I did a few years ago while I was attending a class at Duke Divinity School.  I was reading poems by Vassar Millar and she often referred to heard hands twisted and stiffened by cerebral palsy.  I took inspiration from her poems and created this image. 

Day 90

Thank You Lord for this journey of prayer.  I am grateful for discovering how You are present in my life one little moment and step at a time.  Help me to be present to those who suffer from being restless, irritable, and discontent.  Amen.

Day 89

A Day behind, but I'm still grateful.  Thanks for a night of community, a night of connection.  Amen.

Day 88

Dear God.  I am grateful for all the lessons I have been learning on this journey.

I am grateful for simple tools that help me live a spiritual life instead of just a spiritual theory.

I will try keepin' it simple one day at a time.  peace.  Amen.

Day 87

Please take away my unease.  Help me to know that I am worthy to be loved.  Amen.